Smart College Career Move #4: What Did I Say? The 7 Words That Hold You Back


SCCM Set (1)Your inner conversation, also known as self-talk, exerts more influence over your attitude, achievement, time, success, happiness, relationships, and overall prosperity than you can imagine. Self-talk is best defined as the thoughts and words you use to describe you and what you are doing.

Regardless of whether your inner conversation remains in your head or is expressed out loud to others, there are seven words that can hold you back. These words are: hard, difficult, tough, impossible, can’t, try and never, and usually make an appearance when referencing future actions, especially those related to adversity.

Why should you stop using these seven words? Aside from focusing on the negative, they generate additional mental adversity to overcome and sow seeds of doubt that prevent you from making a full commitment.

Do you occasionally find yourself saying, this is going to be hard, I can never remember names, or it will be tough, but I will try and get it done today? Is it written somewhere that something will be hard, tough or difficult, or that getting something done will be tough.

Have you ever heard a coach tell their team a game will be tough, difficult or impossible to win? Of course not. He or she would never plant such a thought virus into the heads of their players.

When you approach your day with a growing list of things to do, use self-talk that affirms and supports the actions you need to take. Thinking and saying, I can do this or I can get through this, is a great example of affirmative self-talk that keeps you focused and producing your best effort from one task to another.

Right about now, you are probably wondering what I suggest you think and say in place of the seven words you should drop from your self-talk vocabulary. In my view, simply referring to a response or future action as a challenge is preferable because it does not generate additional mental adversity. An example of its use would be, doing this is going to be a big challenge. A statement that readies you for the what you will be facing.

In the midst of a crisis, intentionally referring to actions as challenges might seem trivial, ridiculous, or uncomfortable at first. What you will soon experience, however, is a noticeable difference in the way you think and feel when using the word challenge in place of a more negative expression.

Referring to intentions and actions as challenges sets the stage for mental clarity, optimism, possibility thinking, inspired action, creativity, and aha moments.

Establishing clear goals and intentions and then crafting an inner conversation that supports them is crucial to making self-talk your most important resource and greatest ally in achievement. If you have trouble keeping the seven words I mentioned unsaid, remember this sage advice from many a wise mother, if you can’t say something positive, don’t say anything at all.

About the author:

Michael J. Russ is an international bestselling author, an inspiring speaker/trainer, and the founder of Zero Adversity Training. He is intensely passionate about passing on practical concepts everyone can use to craft a happy, fulfilling, productive, healthy, and well balanced life. Russ is reachable for comments or questions via email at inquiry@michaeljruss.

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